Sunday, May 14, 2006

A Hong Kong Writer's View on Life

I'm very lucky again to be able to read a really good piece by virtue of linking through SeeChuen's blog. This is a description by See Chuen's friend Tale regarding their visit to hear the Hong Kong novelist Wong Bik Won 黃碧雲 being interviewed back in 2004. By now I have read so much about her books that I swear I will get myself a good few of them when I go to Hong Kong (though the truth is I probably won't be there though for another few years... sigh...). I tried searching for her books on YesAsia.com but no surprise that I couldn't find any of hers there at all...

Anyway, about the article itself, I am really touched by how Wong sees her writing and her life. In many respects I can see my own uncertainties being articulated in her words, especially about trying to flee from an unpleasant or more accurately unbearable situation. Or, to use her more positive spin on things, to flutter like a butterfly to more pleasant and greener pastures. (Much better than the jumping-from-the-frying-pan-and-into-the-fire scenario, eh?)

It's given me a little hope that perhaps I too could flutter away to somewhere much nicer than where I am now...


"有人問她:你抱怨書每次都賣得這麼慘,又有人說看不明白,你對讀者有什麼期望嗎?寫下去,又為了什麼?她笑著說,書賣得慘,已經認命了。寫作的時候,每本書都有所不同,有些是歷史的,有些是關於女性的。那些書的企圖比較明顯,但另一些則很難說。至於為什麼還要寫下去,每個階段也有不同的原因。現在的原因是,想回答一些很重要的問題,而寫作的過程回答了這些問題。一些小時候會問的問題,如生命的價值。如果這些問題能夠回答,相信對別人也同樣重要

有人問:你的「Attempts and their failures」是在不斷推翻自己嗎?她說這是一個必要的過程。但這並不意謂著進步,因為可能最後你回到原來的位置,很宿命的。可能走了等於沒走。

有人問她:你為什麼跳舞,為什麼當律師,為什麼這樣之後又那樣。她就不好意思地笑著,當律師是不想再當記者了,想找份好工做。又說這是在數她的缺點。有一次爬山看見蝴蝶在飛,卻總也不知道它在往哪一個方向。一個處境難以忍受了,於是就跳進另一個火堆。或者是那裡好玩,於是又去了那裡。

有人問她:你這樣是在企圖選擇處境嗎?她說她當然想選擇處境了,但往往是處境來選擇你。選擇處境是很困難,同時也太驕傲的想法"
---from Tale's Blog http://www.littlelittle.org/blog/?postid=52


Or perhaps I shouldn't be too proud and should pray instead for the right scenario to choose me? If so, I know I should be more open to change - more pertinently, to actually follow up on the positive changes that's been happening in my life lately, rather than keep putting things off and not keeping in touch with really nice friends and contacts out of sheer lethargy...

What's wrong with me? Don't I know that opportunities need to be grabbed with both hands??

Another thing that struck me about her answers - they've made me realise the importance of the fun of writing, the sheer use of writing as a vent for ideas and emotions. I think I have forgotten about this hugely essential function of writing in my life precisely because I have neglected my writing - both academic and personal - for so long. I have a writer's block for so long, out of sheer fear of the task ahead of me. I can at least admit it now in black and white. No wonder I have been 'hiding' myself in online forums and blogging, and the occasional poetic or novelistic outbursts. I should pull myself together and just start.

Remember what my magic 8 ball says just the day before yesterday?

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2 Comments:

At Sun May 14, 03:04:00 a.m. IST, Blogger Rumour said...

the magic 8 ball told me to pick up a gallon of milk and I forgot, were not speaking now.

 
At Tue Jan 20, 08:47:00 a.m. GMT, Blogger dhd said...

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